2010, I'm not Ready for you Yet!

As a child I recorded New Year's resolutions in a brand new diary. I often received a diary for Christmas - sometimes there was a whole page for each day, sometimes just a few lines. My resolutions usually involved vowing to write in my diary every day. I'm not sure why I was so persistent in resolving to do this year after year. It could be my 'need to please' kind of personality, doing what I thought I should do as a child - write in a diary, use the gifts I was given etc. Although I think there was also a healthy (& hilarious) dose of "If I'm famous in the future, someone will want to read this." (Oh the dreams!)

Aside from recording these resolutions in my diary (which I usually only wrote in for about a week straight - I have several diaries stored at my Dad's with scribbles up until January 7th or something - the rest of the pages are blank!) I rarely reviewed them or followed through on them. Most likely because they weren't SMART (something I've learned to consider more recently when setting goals - not that I've mastered this technique either) - if I recall correctly, typical pre-teen goals recorded in my diary usually went something like this:

- be nice (not exactly specific or measurable even - seeing a pattern with that 'need to please' child?)
- keep room clean (not exactly attainable - especially considering I shared with my younger sister)
- find a boyfriend (not exactly realistic considering I didn't really have control over that matter - though you think it would have been an easier goal to achieve since I grew up in a class full of 28 boys and 3 girls for the 9 years I spent in elementary school ; )

Anyway, you get the idea - maybe your pre-teen years were a bit like this too?

Aside from attempting fresh starts at each New Year, I liked to try for this each September as well - starting off the new school year right, you know.

Well this January 1, 2010 will be started off on a chaotic and messy foot. My new year has probably begun this way before (and most certainly will again) and it probably isn't that significant, however, this year it seems a little more overwhelming than most.

Here's what I'm talking about . . . my shared office/craft space . . . (the space where I want to begin working on finishing off those last two chapters of my MA thesis in earnest on January 4th):

{for notes on this chaos see my set on flickr}

{My handmade Christmas intentions got out of control! And I'm still not done - there are some
gifts yet to made/mailed somewhere in here.}

Since we have plans to head out tonight to enjoy our first Atomic Vaudeville show and I have a giant cramp in my neck (could it be from blowing my nose too enthusiastically with this cold?!?) I really didn't get to tackling this room today so that it would be fresh and neat, and clean, and organized and inspiring to get me off on the 'right foot' for 2010.

:o {

Well it is what it is. And you know what, I wouldn't change it for anything.

So here's to all of 2009's ideas, inspirations and intentions! May they carry me forward to an even better 2010!

And I guess that's this year's resolution - just keep doing what I'm doing - even if that goal isn't Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant or Timely. It seems to be working. At 32 I've never felt more me, nor more connected to who I want to continue to grow to be, and that ain't so bad.

Here's to 2010 - Happy New Year to you!

{What are your resolutions for 2010?}